The Batfamily- Fights at the Wayne Manor
by CamsAlGhul
Summary: With Bruce and the 3 little bats (Jason, Tim and Damian) living in one big house, the fights and discussions are not unfamiliar, but what happens when Dick comes home with exiciting news? Bruce gets overprotective when it comes to love relationships. Dick/Kory Tim/Conner Jason/Talia. ONESHOT


**Okay so this is my first fanfic, its just a small (well maybe not so small) drabble that me and my friend made up and thought it was fun, hope you enjoy it n.n**

**FULL DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NON OF THE CHARACTERS BELOW NOR I OWN DC COMICS IN ANYWAY POSSIBLE.**

**LET THE FUN BEGIN!**

WAYNE MANOR

_(Jason speaking at the phone)_

-Oh Talia you nasty little girl...Ofcourse I enjoyed last night, want to come over and play sum more?

Damian is on the way to the gym for some training when he hears Jason on the phone talking about playing. "tt"

-Todd is such a moron, thinking about playing games when he is old enough to have a job and stop living out of my fathers fortune, and they say Im the kid.

Damian was about to keep walking when he realize he was talking to his mother.

-TODD! WHAT ARE YOU DOING CALLING MY MOTHER FOR A PLAYDATE?! ARE YOU STUPID?

Surprised by the sudden shouting Jason has a look on his face like he just got busted.

-Uh...sure kid...a ppp-play-playdate...hehe

-_JayJay? who are you talking to baby? We are not finish yet._

-Is that my Mother? Why is she calling you "baby"? Todd I demand answers NOW!

-Talia, I'll call you later...

Then all the pieces click in Damians mind, thats when he exploded.

-YOU ARE HAVING SEXUAL INTERCOURSE WITH MY MOTHER YOU FILTHY PIG!

-Hey Demon! calm the fuck down, kay? Its not a big deal.

-I SWEAR I'LL KILL YOU!

-Okay you need to stop shouting before Bruce hears you, now that would be a problem.

-You're right Todd, Father needs to know what you've done to my mother...FATHER! FATHER!

And Damian starts running up the stairs to Bruce study at a speed Flash would be jealous at, Jason running right behind him trying to catch him.

-HEY! SHUT UP DEMON SPAWN!

-FATHER! FATHER!

Bruce Wayne started hearing shouting out of his study "_sigh""Not again" _he thought. Bruce got up from his expensive leather chair and opened the door just to find Damian and Jason on the floor. Damian struggling under the weight of the older man with Jasons hand covering his mouth.

-Jason! Let go of Damian before you crush him!

Damian saw the opportunity and bited Jasons hand.

-OWWW! WHATS WRONG WITH YOU!? YOU DEMONIC BEAST!

Jason roll to his side grasping his hand in pain while Damian reincorporated himself a little out breath.

-Father, Todd is having sexual intercourse with mother. I heard them speaking on the phone.

Bruce just stared wide eyed at his 10 year old son, he definitely was not expecting that.

-*Sigh* Jason we've been over this, you are not allowed to have sexual intercourse with the mother of my son, its just wrong.

Jason gets up.

-But dad! Thats not fair! Dick bang'd your ex's all the time!

-Thats different...

Having heard all the commotion Tim goes out of his room to see whats happening

-Hey whats happening? What was all that noise and shouting?

Bruce-Nothing Tim,go back to your rooom.

-But...

Damian- Yeah Drake go back to "Facetiming" with your boyfriend.

-HE IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND!

Jason- pfff...Yeah right, and Im not banging Talia.

Tim- Whoa you're going out with Talia? So thats what this is about?

Bruce-Whoa! Hey! Stop right there! You have a boyfriend Tim?!

-HE IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND!

Damian-He is fooling around with the Kent clone.

Bruce-SUPER BOY!? Thats it Im calling Superman...

Bruce started dialing Clark Kent's phone number on his cellphone

Tim- Dad please dont!

Bruce-I'll deal with you later now shush...Hey Clark, Bruce here.

-_Hey Bruce! Whats up? __  
_

_-_Did you know YOUR son was going out with MY son?!

Tim-Oh god...Dad! no ones going out with anyone!

Bruce-SHUSH!

_-Yeah! Isnt it awesome!_

_-_Awesome?AWESOME?! That is not...

Bruce stopped because he heard another voice at the end of Clarks line, it was a womans voice, a familiar one...

-Is Diana with you?

-_Yeah, we are dating, I told you on the last league meeting, you werent paying attention huh?_

_-_But...But I thought, I thought...

Bruce needs to stop mid sentence because for some reason Jason, Tim and Damian are beating the shit of eachothers. He needs to do something before Damian kills somebody.

-Listen Clark all you later, we are not over with this.

_-Whatever you say Bats...Wow Diana, thats some sweet lingerie...Gotta go Brucie! bye!_

_*Hangs up*_

Bruce looks down at his kids on the floor beating each other, Jason is on top of Tim while Damian is pulling his hair, Tim looks like he is about to pass out from the weight of Jason on top of him.

-WILL YOU QUIT IT ALREADY!

Suddenly the front door opens and closes letting in Dick with some suitcases, he lets the suitcases on the floor and starts doing summersaults all over the stairs with a joyful expression meeting Bruce and his strugguling brothers on the hallway. Tim and Damian look up and shout with glee -DICK! You're home!. Forgetting completly about Jason now laying startled at the floor.

-Great...

Jason mutters to himself.

Bruce- Why didnt you told me you were in town?! I could have sent a limo with alfred to pick you up.

Dick:I wanted to surprise you.

Dick smiles at Bruce while he hugs Tim and ruffles Damians hair.

Dick- Hi Jason.

-Hey...

Bruce-So good to have you here Dick, what brings you to Gotham?

Dick-Actually I came here to tell you all some great news! Okay get ready...Im getting married!

Tim-Wow Dick thats great!

Damian-"tt"

Jason-Whoa the pretty boy playboy is finally settling down huh?

Bruce-WHAT!? You're too young! You can't get married! I haven't even met her! Who is she?! She is a SHE, right?

Jason and Damian turn to look at Tim while he blushes.

Tim- What are you looking at?

Dick just looks around confused.

Dick-Ehh...yeah she is a she...and dont worry Bruce, you HAVE met her.

Tim-Oh!Oh! Let me guess! Is it Raven? Raven's pretty cool and she's hot.

Jason-pfff Raven? Thats so 2006, she's probably Zatanna, Zatanna is WAAAAY hotter if you want my opinion.

Bruce- No son of mine is marrying a half-demon! Nor a wizard!

Dick-Relax Bruce, Kori is not a half-demon or wizard...she's uh...y'know...alien...

Bruce-...

Jason-Holy shit he has the look again!

Tim-Everyone back off! HE'S GOING TO EXPLODE!

Bruce-...

Dick-Dad...you okay?

Jason:Better back off Golden Boy, daddy's not in the mood.

Damian-I'll go get Pennyworth

Damian starts going down the stairs.

Jason/Tim-Wait! We'll go with you!

Jason and Tim followed Damian down the stairs while Dick hurridly begun following them.

Dick-Hey don't leave me alone!

They followed Damian to the kitchen where Alfred was cleaning.

Damian: Pennyworth we need your assitance immidiately, father is having an episodel.

-What did you do this time Master Damian

-Me?! It was Grayson's fault!

-Ah, Master Dick I didn't know you were at the manor.

-Hi Alfie!

Everyone went cold when they saw Bruce bursting out of the kitchen door, with smoke dumping out of his ears.

Bruce- IM OKAY! IM NOT HAVING AN EPISODE!

Alfred- I believe I should let you fix this by yourselves young masters.

And with that alfred left the kitchen.

Bruce-YOU ARE NOT GETTING MARRIED TO AN ALIEN FROM ANOTHER PLANET! YOU ARE TOO YOUNG!

Dick-Dad Im 24...

Bruce-SHE IS NOT TAKING YOU AWAY FROM ME!

Jason- Jeez, Bruce calm down.

Bruce- I AM CALM! AND NO ONE IS MARRYING NO ONE!

Tim- I don't get whats the big deal Bruce, Dicks in love and he wants to get married he is old enough to make his own decisions.

Bruce- You keep your mouth shut mister, don't think I've forgot about your relationship with Clark's boy.

Tim blushes and shuts his mouth.

Damian-Yeah, better keep your mouth shut Drake.

Tim turns to glare at Damian.

Tim-OMG! We are JUST friends! Is that so hard to believe.

Jason-By the way your face looks like a tomato it is.

Dick-Awww little Timmy is in love.

Dick turns and gives Tim a hug while ruffleling his dark hair. -No im not!. Tim says while struggling in Dick's arms. Dick lets go off Tim suddenly confused.

Dick- Wait a sec Tim, I thought you were dating Cassie.

Bruce- What?! I thought you just broke up with Stephanie.

Tim-yeah...hehe...about that...

Damian-"tt" Drake's such a slut.

Jason- Wow Babybird is on fire, hot blonde batgirl, hot teenage amazon and the clon is not that bad.

Tim:FOR CHRIST SAKE IM NOT DATING ANYONE!

Damian:Just give up already manslut, everybody knows you bring superboy up to your room when father's not around.

Tim: Thats...Thats no true you bastare! Bruce you're seriously gonna believe him!?

Jason:Pfff thats nothing new, Goldie used to bring Babs and Zatanna all the time to do "_Homework"._

Dick: Uh...hehehe

Bruce closed his eyes and took big breaths, _"what did I do to endure this?" _he thought.

Bruce- I'll deal with all of you later, but first thing Dick, you are not getting married.

-But Dad!

-I said no and its final.

Jason-Well thats a first, Dickie doesnt get what he wants.

Bruce- And now back to all of you, you're all grounded no patrolling, Tv nor cookies for 2 weeks.

Everybody- What!? But why!? Thats not fair...

Damian- "tt" This all your fault Grayson.

Jason- Yeah Dick-face thanks alot.

Dick- Sorry guys, wait a sec, you can't ground me! I dont live here anymore!

Bruce- I can, and I will! Now go to your room.

Everybody goes upstairs to their room exept for Dick and Bruce, the looked at each other for what seem like hours when Dick finally decided to break the silence.

-Dad, I really love Kory she's the most amazing woman i've ever met and I want to spend the rest of my life with her.

-Is that what you really want?

-...Yes.

-What about Barbara?

-We are friends...I think...she will understand...

-I just dont want you to get hurt, but if thats what you really want I guess you can marry her.

-Thanks dad. Dick smiles and hugs his mentor tightly.

Then Jason burst in the room his face red from rage.

-I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ALWAYS GET HIM WHAT HE WANTS!

-Jason this is not of your business Im talking to Dick right now, got to your room.

Everyone stops when they heard the bell ring and shortly after Alfred entere the room with Conner Kent AKA Superboy behind him.

Alfred- Master Conner Kent is making us a lovely visit.

Conner- Hi, is Tim here?

Jason looked like he was about to explode, he got his helmet and motorcycle keys.

-THATS IT! Im leaving this shithole! so everybody can be happy WITHOUT ME!

He storms out passing Conner and slams the door. Bruce heard the roar of the motorcycle from outside and sighed.

Conner- So...Is he here?

Bruce- NO!

Tim appears running down the stairs with a smile flashing across his face. -CONNER!

Bruce presses a nerve in his shoulder slightly making the teen fall unconsious on the floor by his feet.

Bruce-As you can see Conner, Tim is not feeling so well.

Dick-BRUCE!. Dick protested.

Conner- Okaaaay...I'll come back later...

He goes out the door procesiong what had just happened, "_What a bunch of_ weirdos." he thought.

Dick- I CANT BELIEVE I COME HOME FOR JUST ONE VISIT, JUST ONE! AND HELL BREAKS LOOSE!

Bruce- "sigh" I'll go to my room, need anything just call ok?

Dick- Bruce wait! I Kori wants to meet all of you so I kinda told her she could come tommorow for dinner.

Bruce- Okay, she can come tommorow and meet us.

-And she will spend the night here too as well.

-In here? With you? On the same room?

-Bruce...

-Okay okay, she can stay the night

-You sure she can come tomorrow? I can still call and cancel.

-No tomorrow is fine, i want to meet her, Alfred will prepare a lovely dinner and everybody will be at their best behavior.

-Thanks bruce. Dick smiled -Now...should we go and look for Jason?

Damian- He'll come back, he always does. Damian said suddenly entering the room stomping on Tims hand on his way.

Tim-Ouch! Huh?...What happened? Wheres Conner?

Bruce- Uh..He got a call...from Superman...Emergency on Metropolis...YES! Thats it.

Tim-Oh...

Jason suddenly enters like nothing had happened.

Jason- Hey Bruce need some cash for Mc'donalds.

Bruce-..."sigh" Yes...I guess we can all have Mc'donalds.

Dick- YEY!

Damian- "tt"

Tim- So Conners busy...can I invite Cassie?

Damian- Slut. he muttered

Bruce-...Yes...I guess she can come too.

Jason- Hmm so Talia...

Damian and Bruce- NO!

The rant starts again on the way to door. Dick just smiles at his family.

Dick- Im definately calling Kory to cancel.

**THE END!**

**SO let me know in the reviews if you liked it I would really appreciate it that :D, I'll do more if it gets reviews If it doesnt well i'll try something else n.n thank you for reading **


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